Sneha received Abir’s reply about her Rajshahi trip after two hours. He wrote- I will try my best. I’m under surveillance here. Hope you understand. Sneha felt no anger or hurt. Instead, she was happy that Abir said he would try to meet. She never wanted to pressure him or cause problems with his work or family. Cheerfully, she replied- No worries. Don’t take pressure. If we don’t meet, I’ll just grab some stranger and make him sing for me! lol! Abir answered- Come on!
The first day she met Abir in Rajshahi was probably one of the most beautiful days of Sneha's life. Or perhaps the most beautiful day she would ever have, until the day she died. Even now, she still wants to think of it that way. There was nothing ugly on that day. It was all joy, all peace and a complete feeling of heaven.
Landing from the afternoon flight on February 13, Sneha sat in the HiAce sent by Hotel Grand River View and began quietly observing the neat little city as they drove. A few minutes after getting in the car, the driver asked her- Is this your first time in Rajshahi, madam? His accent had a regional pull, though Sneha couldn’t tell if it was Rajshahi or Chapainawabganj. She had heard that many people from Chapai lived in Rajshahi. Watching the sunset through the window, she replied- No, maybe second or third time. I don’t remember exactly. But not the first time.
She had gone there twice before with Abba, maybe when she was in class seven or eight. She couldn’t recall clearly now, but it had to be around that time. The airport had a strange name- Shah Makhdum Airport. Surely it is named after a saint. But why didn’t she know about him? She felt annoyed at herself. If a district airport named after someone, he is undoubtedly important! How couldn't she know about a significant figure of her own country? Sneha genuinely couldn't accept it. She called herself an idiot a few times and made a mental note- first thing at the hotel, look up about Mr. Makhdum. But the word itself, what did it mean? She needed to know that right then. A quick Google search came back immediately- Makhdum meant religious leader or teacher. And along with it, she learned that Shah Makhdum's real name wasn’t actually that, he’d been called Makhdum in that region, But his real name was Abdul Quddus Jalaluddin.
Jalaluddin was a more beautiful name, Sneha felt. He could have been known by that. Though then again, it would have clashed with Hazrat Shah Jalal (R). Two Jalal saints in one country might cause confusion among the followers or devotees, that thought made her laugh! Those were just her assumptions. She was still wandering through it when the car pulled up somewhere called Kazihata. The hotel's exterior looked decent enough, if the inside held up, she’d be fine, Sneha thought, eyeing it top to bottom. Just then, Abir texted- reached hotel? His eighth text since Hazrat Shahjalal Airport, tracking her from boarding to landing to Shah Makhdum to now.
Sneha’s heart filled with strange happiness. She tried to think- why! Then she realized that she was in the same city, where Abir was also somewhere. Whether they met or not, whenever they met, she was now in the same city. Humming Level Five’s song, “Tumi shamne nei, tao tumi vasho…moner maajhe lukiye ektukhani haaso...” and typed back- Yes, sir! I’m in the hotel.
Abir wrote back immediately- Take rest. I’ve an official dinner tonight. Can't avoid it. I will try to come early morning tomorrow. Sneha hummed, “sokal theke raater sheshe thako amar pashe...tatatta ta tararaa…tararaa rara rara rara rara” and replied- no worries! Don't stress, Sir. But Abir kept stressing anyway, texting every little while to ask what she was doing, what she’d eaten, whether everything was okay, whether the hotel was fine. Then he saw her story, a photo of a whisky glass and again texted- don’t drink too much. Save some for tomorrow. Sneha laughed at that and typed it out too- Ha Ha Ha!
14th of February. Sneha hadn't gone to Rajshahi with Valentine's Day in mind. In fact, she wouldn’t have believed she’d meet Abir at all, until she walked out of the hotel and found him sitting in the driver's seat of a black C-HR in the parking lot below. Ah…how long had it been since she last saw him? Sixty-one days! Though she didn’t say it aloud, fearing Abir might feel embarrassed. Wearing a newly bright red tops from Artisan, Sneha stood in front of the car. Abir looked at her the way one looks at someone after a long absence, eyes full of recognition and wonder. As she opened the door, he flashed his heavenly smile and said- What’s up? Sneha smiled shyly, like a little girl and simply shook her head once to the right, then to the left. She felt eleven years old. Maybe just turned twelve.
From 10:30 a.m. to 10:30 at night- a full day, from morning through afternoon, evening and into the night, they drove around the city endlessly- T‑Bandh, Bagha Shahi Mosque, Rajshahi University campus, Borokuthi, then Airport Road, place after place, they kept moving. They didn’t get out of the car during the day, except at lunchtime, when they stopped at a multi-cuisine restaurant called Calisto in Saheb Bazar. Over coral fish BBQ with Thai fried rice, they talked their way from Shah Makhdum all the way to Nizamuddin Auliya. The conversation had no end.
Before going in, they’d sat in the parking lot for a while, drinking whisky and talking, when a restaurant staff came up to the car to ask if they’d be dining. That interruption irritated Abir immediately. He rolled down the window and said in a slightly aggressive tone- hey, I’m talking to my lady. Will you please excuse us? The man apologized and went back inside. Sneha looked at Abir for a long moment after that. He looked back. And then, without quite deciding to, they leaned toward each other and after so many months, their lips met again. The same pull, the same intensity- just like the first time. That moment, after so long, Sneha felt like she found life inside herself again.
They talked endlessly through the drive. There are so many things to say between them. Sneha teased him all day about his driving- you drive terribly, she kept saying. Abir was so confused and would slow down, becoming even more careful. But still, she’d say- I’m a better driver than you! He simply couldn’t accept that. The teasing went back and forth for a long time. Between arguments, they played song after song, mostly Abir’s choices. Even with music, he had that same restlessness- playing one track and then skipping it, saying- It’s nice, but won’t listen now. Sneha even watched his impatience activities with quiet fascination!
By evening, just after parking near the Padma River, Abir said out of nowhere- no woman has ever sat beside me in my driving seat for this long before. Sneha laughed- oh, that's quite a line! Abir held his ground- I swear! I’m not lying. She laughed again- as if your wife didn’t ride in your car? He replied, just as seriously- Believe me, she doesn’t. She has her own car. She uses that. Only my daughter does, sometimes. There was a brief pause. Sneha actually believed him that time, and she felt a quiet tenderness for him- Ah, my poor man! He doesn’t even get to drive around with someone like this. Though, remembered that memory, Sneha is laughing out loud right now!
From evening until late into the night, they stayed by the Padma. Sitting beside each other in the quiet, they held each other’s hands the entire time, saying nothing and needing nothing more. They turned silence itself into something deeply enjoyable. Someday Abir might be gone, but this memory of sitting here beside each other, would bring Sneha joy. Or perhaps, she thought, tremendous pain. Even with him right there beside her, that thought pulled her inward, past the quiet of the riverbank and into a deeper, darker quiet of her own.
It was getting late. Sneha would have to leave for Dhaka the next morning. Abir too, would have to leave soon for the cantonment. Someone in his position couldn’t just stay out for long hours or late into the night without consequences. There were responsibilities, explanations to give. But in the time, he spent with Sneha, he seemed completely detached from all of that. From the noise, the chaos, the weight of the world, they had stepped into a different reality altogether. A world where only the two of them existed. As if no one else had permission to enter.
Soon, they would have to get up and return to their separate destinations. Right then, breaking the silence, suddenly Abir asked Sneha to play a song of James. She searched Spotify but couldn’t find it there, finally locating it on YouTube. To play it, she had to slip her hand briefly from Abir’s grasp. When she reached back, Abir held her hand tighter than before and they listened together-
Aro kichhukhon ki robe bondhu
Aro kichhu kotha ki hobe
Bolbe ki shudhu bhalobashi tomay
Bolbe ki shudhu tumi je amar
Muchhe fele shob jorota…muchhe fele shob jorotaaa…
As the last line played, Sneha tried to hold Abir’s hand tighter. Instead, Abir pressed her hand firmly against the left side of his chest. Sneha felt his heartbeat- dhuk dhuk…dhuk dhuk…dhuk dhuk…dhuk dhuk… He didn’t let go, holding her hand there until the song ended.
At half past ten, Abir pulled up in the hotel parking lot and sat quietly for a while, still holding her hand. Then suddenly said, I'll try to come tomorrow again, for a bit. Though I can't promise. If I can't make it, don't feel sad, please. His words nearly moved her to tears, not out of sadness, but because she was so deeply touched. With great effort, she held them back. Seeing him in Rajshahi at all had been a miracle to Sneha. And then a day like this, morning all the way through to night, like something from a dream. A day this beautiful had never come to her before.
Sneha smiled and said, don't be stressed! If you can, come. If you can't, we'll meet again. No worries. Before Abir left, both of them went a little quiet. He said more than once, I don’t feel like to go. I want to stay a little longer with you. But I have to... It was written all over his face and in his voice that leaving her like this made him really sad. Sneha wanted to stay a little longer with him too. But instead, she said, it’s late. You should go now. Then she kissed his hand and was stepping out of the car.
Abir then said- if you can, arrange a little bit of whisky for tomorrow, please! Sneha laughed and stepped out. He waved and drove away. She stayed there until the car disappeared from sight. Back in her room, she texted Abir- Happy Valentine's Day, Amon! Half an hour later, his reply came- Oops! Happy Valentine's Day, Mademoiselle!