I know you don't love me, I totally understand that. I've known this for a long time now. What I don't understand is why? Where did I go wrong? I tried, I'm still trying. I don't know what will make you love me. I don't know what I'm supposed to do with all this love that I have for you. A part of me wants to be free and break everything that connects me back to you, and then there's another part that collects all the broken pieces, puts them together and goes back to you, again. When I was a child my parents played a game with me. They would tell me that I was adopted. I would start crying every time upon hearing that. So I used to pack all my belongings, a doll which had fiery red hair all tangled up and two frocks, in a poly bag and bid farewell to everyone and leave. My dad used to enjoy it a lot. He would see what I would do, how far I would go. I used to cross the nearby road and take the next gully, all the while looking back if my parents were coming to take me back home. They wouldn't loose sight of me of course. Then all of a sudden I would see my dad walking towards me. I would speed up. My dad would then come running after me, take me in his arms, and give me a tight hug. He would then tell me it was a joke, I'm their daughter, I always was and they love me a lot. I guess I never grew up emotionally. I still play that game, with you in it. The child inside me wants you to come running behind me, and take me in your arms. It wants you to reassure her that all this time you were just playing that silly little game, you loved me, you love me. Probably that's the reason why I go back to you again and again. I leave for you to chase me, stop me. But there you are, utterly bewildered at this mad mad person and her stupid game. Perhaps one day that little girl will leave and won't look back.
